i had a weird dream last night about a sinster world where people on foot and on bicycle were being weeded out and killed. the only behavior that was acceptable was to drive a car or big truck. i was part of the resistance and was on my bike and all this bad stuff was happening--a big rig tried to run me over and i confronted the driver and she was like "well, you are on a bike, and that's not allowed", and my mom was part of a runner's group who were running together down the road and we were all scared that the were going to be shot by snipers. there was also some sort of ban on loving animals and my brothers were there and we had some dogs and were holding them in our laps and loving on them, all the while shooting sideways glances to see if we were being watched. it was the worst place ever! i usually don't dream about people i know that often, and this one had tons of friends and family in it, so it was particulary scary.
E is going to help me start getting up earlier in an effort to improve my mental state. this morning he brought me coffee and cooked me breakfast. and this week, he's going to call me and get me out of bed at 7 every day and if i don't get up, he's taking away my inclusion in his entertainment budget. tough love!
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3 weeks ago
4 comments:
Good for you (about the proactive stance on mental health, not the dream.) I used to struggle with depression, but I've since discovered I can lick it by being proactive and heading off any episodes with constructive action (exactly the kind you're taking, as a matter of fact, especially the sleep part) rather than with prescription pills like I used to.
One thing I do when it gets rough for me (just something for you to consider, I'm not saying you should do this) is to keep a bottle of No-Doz (caffeine pills) by my bed. So those mornings that are really bad and I can't seem to muster the strength to get up on my own, I take one of them. Then 20 minutes later I'm up and about and can start my day and not feel guilty (which is self-perpetuating and can trigger depression, btw) about sleeping through the things I should have done but didn't b/c I couldn't get up.
I'm glad your brothers and mom were all on the right side in your dream.
Do you think maybe you are getting carbon monoxide poisoning? Better check our your new hippie van, that is what changed most recently isn't it? Are you using any kind of propane heater?
no propane heat, i use an electric heater when i'm parked at my spot. could be just the new space causing the disturbance.
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