ahh. i talked to E this morning, and while all is not good in the world, at least we can converse about it. i have been somewhat self-centered lately, and to some extent that's how i choose to live my life--i'm here to learn what i'm here to learn and i can't and won't sacrifice following my path to try to change someone's opinion of me. it's my sincere intention not to step on anyone in the process. if it feels good to be around me, then our paths are converging, if not then it's either a potential lesson for us to learn and grow from, or it's our paths diverging. neither possibility is better than the other, and neither of us should feel guilt about our choice.
so, i've decided not to store my stuff at E's, even though we haven't talked about it yet, i just don't want him to feel like i'm abusing him. i'm going to rent a storage space--maybe a garage where i can also park the van and the motorcycle (till i sell it), that way i can be totally self-sufficient and not burdening anyone's physical or psychological space. i hope to be able to give up the crutch of storage before long and be a totally contained van-dweller.
i'm going to the butterfly pavillion today with my friends sarah and kree to gain a little metamorphosis perspective. remind me that the impossible happens every day...
desert heat/small doge/blind faith
14 hours ago