today was the worst day of the year so far. i spent last night tossing and turning in a feverish misery. it was very cold outside so i took a hot water bottle to bed, and turned the heat up to high, but even so i was cold. i woke up shivering and tensed up so tight my muscles were cramping. i realized then that i was really sick. so i plugged in my electric mattress pad and sealed every cranny with down. i warmed up and fell asleep for a while. it was an awful night, but i was as comfortable in the van as i would have been in a house. i'm a spoiled van-dweller with electric heat and a quiet safe place to park.
this morning when the sun came out, i opened the side door to get some fresh air and let Freyja out. there's a cat that likes to come visit and is a very curious fellow. Frey doesn't like him and i don't let him come into the van because that's her space too, but the problem becomes how to keep him out when i have the door open. well, on a normal day, i'd just shoo him off, but i was dead weight in bed this morning so i made a decision that i'm not proud of--i threw a C battery at him and hit him in the head. he ran off immediately and i felt like such a shithead for doing that. he wasn't doing anything wrong, just being his sweet self and i poured my agony out on him. later on when i was driving to E's house, i saw him trotting down the sidewalk and i stopped to check him out. he didn't look hurt, and i asked his forgiveness. we'll be pals again i'm sure.
i was supposed to work tonight, but i couldn't get it together enough to go in. E has been taking care of me since he got off work and i really couldn't ask for a better friend right now. my mom could probably do a better job, but that's because well, she's my momma. he's gone out twice to get me what i wanted to eat--first round of saltines and ginger ale, second round chicken soup and ice cream. what a guy!
so, a little update on van life--i installed a cabinet above my sink to keep all the little things i use frequently like knives, toothpaste, soap, thermometer, wine key etc. i bought a solar shower and a new propane stove at REI but haven't tried either. and i'm going through all my clothes again and getting rid of more things i don't really wear. i took a garbage bag full to buffalo exchange on monday and got 35 bucks for it. still feeling good about vandwelling, but it's alot of work. every minute detail has to be attended to, and each possession must prove it's value or be terminated.
i'm going to recover and cuddle up with E for a while. good night all.
desert heat/small doge/blind faith
14 hours ago