if you've checked the comment section of my blog lately, you'll see much spirited discussion between me and a few of my relatives. it's really got me thinking, and i want to put this out there as my intention.
i want to be a christian if god wants me to be one. that's going to take a miraculous conversion effort on god's part, and i'm sure god is capable, but so far god has not revealed christianity to be the way for me. nothing short of this will do, no emails, no books, no endless reasoning and explanation. i know christians have reasons they believe, but the basis is that they just BELIEVE. that's the component i don't have and can't be given to me by anyone but god.
i came across an interesting website today, a blog of a woman who was converted at age 37 through some sort of god attack. i'm intrigued, and i'll be reading her story.
i am an open person. i do not want to deny or contradict anything just because i don't find it appealing. i don't feel empty without religion or faith, so it hasn't been a real motivating factor for me, but it seems to be an area of endless contention in my family. if it doesn't happen, and i don't end up a christian, i hope they can accept that i tried, i asked and i did not receive. and if christ wins, then we all go out for drinks and celebrate.